Models and Muslim food

Sorry this is a tad out of order. And make sure to e-mail me with requests on what illegal movies you want for Chinese souvenirs.

For June 25, 2007

"China is very layered." ~words of wisdom courtesy Tyler

Who would have thought I'd end up learning more about China than I will probably ever be able to gather (because of the language barrier and time) from a model and world drifter/traveler named Tyler.

I really expected today to be low-key. Classes were classes and afterwards I headed to Tous Les Jour, the yummy bakery with even yummier free wi-fi. I'm plugging away on homework when in walks this beautiful man in a suit that would have made headlines on Craig's List of "Missed Connections." Two girls from my program were also there and he ended up grabbing a free table next to them as I wished madly I was Grace and/or Marlene. They all ended up chatting a while about our program and about his modeling (I'm almost positive it's a habit of his to slip in that little fact when talking to females). At one point I sheepishly/awkwardly went up to him (i.e., crossed several yards of floor space) to ask him if he'd been here long and if so, how hard was it to get the Yangtze River and go white-water kayaking. Oh yes, I wanted to talk to him badly. When Grace and Marlene left, I decided to move base to his table, mumbling that people wanted my prime wall outlet table (they did, I swear).

Well, Tyler turned out to be a talker. And we covered many, many topics. He's lived in China for three years, Beijing for two, and works at a domestic advertising firm. He's originally from Seattle. He had his portfolio with him of ads he's been in (I don't know whether he helped produce them as well) and was in a suit because he had had an audition earlier in the day for a car commercial. I gathered he was Lutheran and has a younger brother. He also likes dirt-biking, skiing, scuba diving, has eaten poisonous snake and has his nipples pierced (hm, too much info that time guys?). Actually, it was interesting how I found out he was Lutheran. We found ourselves on the subject that I was adopted and he asked if I was religious based on that. Not to restrict his talents (or good looks) to simply modeling, he's also acted in the movie "Diamond Dogs" which he said would probably be a B-rate action film. Now, the cool part of this story was that it was filmed in inner Mongolia which many of my fellow classmates want to visit on their long four-day weekend. I asked him whether I should consider doing that as well and he said no (I figured--it didn't sound that cool). The one interesting thing he did discover while filming, though, was a stretch of land covered with dogs' feet--some with fur still covering them, some bare bone. His guess was that the locals ate the dogs then discarded the remnants in this elephant graveyard. If you're wondering about the legitimacy of the story (like I was), he has a movie on his silver RAZR to prove it. Actually, he discovered another interesting thing while filming--wild marijuana growing amongst vegetable gardens owned by the locals who didn't know what it was and cared even less. Like a kid in a candy shop, he said he took as much as he could stuff in is jacket/down his pants and gleefully smoked for two months. Tyler echoed Dave (guy from punk show) in saying pot was hard to find but hash was quite abundant. Being here longer than a month though, Tyler has found places notorious for the grass goodness. I'm sure I sounded quite sketchy asking which places they were exactly and can I take the subway there, but it's all with good intentions, I assure you. I believe the places that have that are ultimately places that have the kind of alternative culture I find fascinating and want to explore. A bit backward from how most people would typically react upon learning of such places I imagine, but what can I say. He also said (and he apologized for this generalization) it was a good bet that any black person you see around probably deals.

I also met his friend Amit (he was Jewish) who had taken a year off school in CA to come study here on his own. Like Tyler, he had started off at Tsinghua but hated it and had switched to Beijing Univ. of Science and Technology (I think). Unlike Tyler, he was still in school. And studied. I found out that in the year he has been here, he's been completely content eating from street vendors. Except for the vendors down the little alley I found. That has been the only time he's gotten sick and I certainly related.

By this point, it was getting rather late and I was almost done with homework so Tyler invited me to go with to a Muslim restaurant just down the road he had recommeded earlier. On the way he showed me some cool little coffee shops I never would have discovered on my own, a breakfast place with specials on the weekend until 11:30 a.m., a shady and completely illegal but reliable place to get money exchanged, and Wudaokou's Korea Town (apparantly it's a joke that Wudaokou is the Korea Town). We walked to what I believe was the Univ. of Science and Technology for the restaurant which was on campus. On the way, he entertained me with more stories of death-defying feats--he used to drive in China, see. That is, until he had his motocycle taken by the police. According to him, the majority of the vehicles on the road are illegal. They either have fake license plates or none at all. It's just bad luck when you get caught. Usually patrolling is stepped up after a news-making incident, but without fail, life gradually slips back to comfortable chaos after a while. Not to depart from the theme of the night, the restaurant we went to was completely illegal. It even told you up front that they did not give receipts. By far the most interesting thing I learned from the Ty was the random cash prizes one can receive from scratching off places on legitimate receipts. It's the government's way of promoting people asking for receipts and therefore forcing businesses to report for tax purposes. Of course, that incentive doesn't come anywhere near to stopping the widespread illegal business that goes down everywhere. Most places print fake receipts. Tyler only asks for legit receipts as a way to get back at a place for bad service. He gave his opinion that waiters never get any better due to the Communist system. People do not believe in tips here.

The restaurant contained the most diverse group of people I've seen in one setting so far. Our meal was very good--we ate noodles made from vegetables, an eggplant dish and lamb. At one point, Tyler saw one of his "friends" who he wanted to buy from and invited him to sit with us so as to not appear too crass just using him for drugs. Who says druggies aren't caring people, too? The guy turned out to be from Nigeria and has been here for four years studying Chinese. He even had a Chinese wife who sat across from him playing a game on a cellphone and looking/sounding very Asian while doing so. No, I can't explain why, but trust me, she was ASIAN. They'll officially get married sometime in the future before they die. The deal and exchange was talked about very blatantly in front of me but I suppose the majority of the people in the restaurant would not have understood what was happening anyway.

We finally parted ways with plans to meet again Thursday so he can take me to THE place to get illegal copies of any and all movies and tv shows (it's swanky--supposedly they're even in alphabetical order). From there, the 798 Artist Area is a hop away. He's going down to that area for business, so I plan to tag along and then check out some art galleries. Any requests for movies/tv shows send them to me via e-mail before Thursday at 3 p.m. my time and I'll do my best.